Taking Responsiblity

We are responsible for all we do in life for ourselves.

Responsibility is one of the biggest issues that we interact with everyday in the world around us.  Whether that is concerning the interaction that we have with another person or the way we take on things inside ourselves in our own individual experiences.  We are faced with the contemplation of whether to take full responsibility for our own actions or experiences within all that we do, a choice that is determined by how we deal individually with situations.  This at times leads to pinpointing real issues that we have inside ourselves and the nature of how we can cope with everyday experiences.

Not everyone can deal with certain circumstances that they come across in life.  Sometimes things can seem too big a task to take on that it is a slow process in order to get enthusiasm, not wanting to give full responsibility to the task at hand.  This then can at times lead to conflicts and issues between other people when someone does not take on the full responsibility for their own original choices made, especially if they make plans that effects other people involved.  It might be because some responsibilities that we take on have not our interest, or desire, and lead us to not finish or rather poorly resolve things we decide to at one time participate in.

What is the basis of this poor judgment on our own part that leads us to make decisions that we cannot fulfill or take full responsibility for?

A good way to see this is in a visual way, by detailing and experience of a person who would come across the same issues.  For example, Daniel who has made a decision to help a friend even though he does not know if he has the means in which to deliver his word.  His friend is Peter and when he was at the party talking with him last night, he asked him for help on Sunday at his house with some moving of his furniture.  What they both do not realize is that already a responsibility has been taken on by both of them in arranging the situation in the first place.  Sunday comes and Daniel is late and Peter calls him up to ask if everything is ok.  Daniel responds by telling him that he forgot and that he had other plans for the day. 

Well this is an obvious and direct representation of responsibility, outwardly seen.  Daniel did not keep to his word so then in turn not taking responsibility for what he arranged to do for his friend. 

If you think that Peter does not also have a part to play in all of this you are wrong.  Peter also has responsibilities of his own.  He knew himself earlier that he could arrange to have someone come and move the furniture for him.  However now his is stuck with no help at all, because of his need to save money, he has to take responsibility now on his own shoulders.  Instead he asked his friend Daniel so he would not have to pay for the costs.  Now that he has to rely on his friend it has left him also in a powerless situation, that he himself does not take responsibility for in his own choosing.  Peter is angry at his friend now for not being there for him.  Should he be angry with himself for not taking his own responsibility for the task he had to get done himself, relying on others to do it for him?  If he wants to take the risk to ask someone else for help then his own real answer is to wait patiently to help arrives and not rely on it to bring eventual reward. 

This is where the underlying issue of responsibility takes full circle.  We all have responsibilities for all the things we do in our lives, no matter what they are, whether they be a word, or an action, or a choice, we take on the full spectrum of the result to all that we participate in.  As soon as we give away responsibility to another and rely on them for what we can ourselves achieve, we give away our own control of how we deal with the issue at hand.  Then we get angry at the people who do not fulfill our goals to what we desire, when in real truth we should also be viewing ourselves and why we need to ask for help in the first place.

What is not acknowledged is that every single person in life, no matter what they do, have their own unique responsibility to hold within themselves.  That responsibility is for their own choices, actions, and wellbeing for all that they do in life.  No matter what type of responsibilities they are.  No other person out there has responsibility on what we ourselves as individuals achieve or fulfill in our lives and in ourselves.  We are the main contributor to our lives and the only one who truly knows what we need and what we need to fulfill.

If we become angry with another, often it can come from our own problems of not being able to handle the situation ourselves and the responsibility we have when it comes to the issue.  This anger is not then so much towards the other person, it can be a way of expressing the fact that we as individuals do not always know how to deal with certain situations ourselves.  The responsibility gets so big that we have to rely on others to get us through.  It is not until we fall deep into a puddle of pressure that we realize that the only way we will actually achieve what we want for ourselves is when we take full responsibility for all that we wish to achieve, no matter the obstacles or challenges that come our way.  If we have to ask for help in this process, if we are taking full responsibility in ourselves, then we will wait it out until the very end without criticism, allowing others their own choices in the process.

There is no use sitting idly jealous and angry at others for achieving things that we can also achieve in ourselves.  We can every one of use stand up to the challenge.  If we continue to ask for help, never taking the responsibility ourselves for our own choices and actions, and continue to be angry at others for not fulfilling our wishes, it might well end up that we are left alone to wallow in our own state of feeling sorry for ourselves.  It is at this point then, when there is no one left to be there for us, after pushing all away, that we have to stand up on our own two feet and make a choice to take responsibility for our own lives and all that we do.  We then realize that most people have problems already to deal with through what they have to achieve themselves then to have to hold up everyone else along the way.  Eventually it becomes to heavy a burden also for them to handle and so they eventually have to let go so they do not fall themselves. 

It can at times be hard to face things that might seem like a struggle.  We look to others and feel a certain jealousy when we see that they are doing well in their lives, and we presume that they have life so easy and simple.  What is really showing is a person that has taken responsibility into themselves for their own life, choosing not to ask always for help from others but instead to push through it in themselves.  Outwardly they might look as if they have the world in their hands, but the process to go through the experience has been the same, only that they took the responsibility on for themselves without falling onto others to do it for them.

We can forever search outside of ourselves for answers and help, but all the help is already within.  When we take responsibility for our own lives and actions then, only then, will we fulfill all that we dream and hope to achieve.

Responsibility is what makes us who we are, it is our life, and by grasping it in our own hands, we hold our life strong and create all that is possible.  We are then declaring that we are in charge of our own world and all that we do and receive from our journey is a reward for ourselves.  It is our own life; it is our responsibility to take control of it.

By Stacey T Pollock.